Monday I had talked to T about a shift change. I explained how R was covering my shift this week so I could take an equivalent shift of her's next week. It was easy enough, but not really. T got really confused and started to explain that we had not yet met a credit goal, so some adjustments had to be made with the schedule.
As he continues to explain, I find out that basically I will not be getting many hours because I am not meeting my credit goals. I was livid. Instead of pissing and moaning and throwing a mannequin, I calmly explained my reasoning for hesitating with credit.
Basically I don't feel comfortable pushing a credit card on someone when I know the financial burden can cause. Trust me, I know from personal experience. By the end of our conversation I was upset. I love my job and don't want to have to quit but, I may have to if I can't get enough hours.
The last ten minutes of my shift I was pissed and fought back angry tears. When the clock struck 2, I stormed out tears running down my cheeks. I was so frustrated. I thought I had found such a great job only to not get the hours needed to pay my bills.
I sat in my car bawling. All I could think about is "How am I going to pay the 750 for tuition this month?" .
Money.Money.Money.
There never is enough.
It really bothers me how everything is going well in my life except for the finances. I am broke and in serious debt because of my school. As I think back to all of the times I have cried in the past month, I realize the have been because of financial situations. I am over crying all of the drama from people, now I am stuck on the Benjamin's.
Once again I am back to my original plan. I start setting up for me to move back to MN. There I would have a place to live and there would be plenty of job options. I would have to drop out of school and start paying interest on my loans but at least I would have some place to live.
While all of this financial burden is on my mind I have to go to school and balance the 18 credits I signed up for. Hello shit storm party of one.
So I may not have been in the best mood for the past couple weeks because of all of this. I am only human my smile fades as I get overwhelmed.
Last night before I went to bed, as I do best, I made up a list of employment options as well as thing I had to get done. When I fell asleep I was prepared, and looking forward to, having the day to get financially organized. Instead I get a phone call at 9 asking if I could work.
Even though I didn't really want to go in, I had to get paid. I needed the hours. So I go in and get an awesome greeting/ scowl from C "Why are YOU here? You don't work". Oh thank you C for the usually cheery attitude.
Fortunately I was in a good mood. I was perfectly content even though I was stuck organizing the whole Cacique section plus running till. I have all the quads done when T comes over and gives me that look. It was that we need to talk. In my head I kept thinking "shit, shit, shit! He is going to fire me. I did something wrong.".
Instead he started by explaining that he noticed I was upset as I was leaving work on Monday and wanted to apologize for any confusion. It wasn't what I had expected at all. I explained my situation and, he made my day.
I told T that I understand it is part of my job to sell credit and since I didnt feel comfortable doing so I would understand if I needed to put in my two weeks. This is when he suprised me. "NO. No.no. I don't want to lose you. You sell the product and present yourself in a very professional manner and I would be able to overlook the credit if you woud stay". I was so relieved. It also didnt hurt that in his speech he flooded me with complements about my work.
I didn't show it, but i was doing a happy dance inside.
Although I am still in...oh about 100,000 dollars in debt, I am glad that I have a job I love to help me lower that number.
I am a workaholic. I love working and being busy. If you don't believe me look at my W-2's! Tonight I started filing my taxes with the W-2s I have and couldn't believe how many jobs I have had in 2008. I am getting 5 W-2s back but have only recieved three which only brought in under 3,000 dollars. Funny thing is those were side jobs and the rest of my source of income will be found on the last two. Well, at least thats what is filed. I have so many random side jobs that it is hard to keep track.
Just for fun, and because I love making lists lets review my jobs for 2008:
Rwemp-C-Store Clerk
Media Hub-Student Worker
TLC Home Healthcare- Personal Care Attendant
Country Critters Daycare-Child Wrangler/Houskeeping
Lane Bryant-holiday sales associate (now part time sales :) )
--now off the books
Nanny-Chased after three wild kids
Occasional Babysitter (for two family friends)
Construction Work- painted, ripped out carpet, stained boards, took out windows, ect
Houskeeper- Cleaned 3 people's houses
Cabin Care-Cleaned cabins and washed windows for a friends buisness
Yard Work/Landscaping- Raked, Mowed, moved mountains, ect (I still have not gotten paid)
Overnight Team Leader- Showed off school to prospective students
In addition to all of these I also volunteered countless hours of my time to school groups I was in and helping family and friends with their projects. Oh yeah and I am a full time student.
I am sorry what did you call me earlier? A slacker? Ha ha yeah from first glance
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